In all my years of serving at community colleges, sometimes I think I have learned more from my students, than they have learned from me. Everyday has challenges, but I am so blessed beyond measure. The story of this young man has impacted me deeply and I am blessed to have him in my life to this day, so many years later. Thanks to this young man, I learned to trust my instincts. I also learned to be open to the experiences of my students and to listen deeply to their needs.
It all started during a relatively normal situation. The college offers a college success course, as most community colleges do. I was asked by the instructor to come into class do a presentation about all the services the college offered. While I was talking, I noticed one student in particular. He seemed upset and even angry. I began to focus on him a bit more during my presentation. As I ended my speech, I gave out a business card to each student and encouraged everyone to see me.
As I walked out of the classroom, something haunted me. This student’s eyes stayed with me. I felt like I needed to speak with him. I went towards my office and decided to speak with a colleague about what I experienced. My colleague encouraged me to reach out to the instructor. I went to my office resolute in going back to the classroom at the end of the period.
I went about my business and realized it was time to go back to the classroom. As I stood up from my desk, my assistant walked into my office and stated that I had a student who was insistent on speaking with me at that moment. I walked out with her and saw it was the student I was concerned about wanting to see me. I was so relieved to see him.
I walked him into my office and closed the door. He opened up about all the issues hindering his academic progress. He specifically discussed some concerns he had regarding some personnel at the college. I listened intently and took copious notes to be able to relay the personnel matters to the appropriate parties at the college. I was moved by all that he shared with me in that first meeting. I felt trusted and knew in my soul that I was in the right place, at the right time to able to help him heal.
Over the years, we bonded and he would visit every few weeks while he was in school. He is incredibly intelligent, but needed someone to help him clear his mind to move forward. In time, he introduced me to his girlfriend and I helped her with her classes, as well. I was in the reception area the day his world crumbled. He entered and I saw the look on his face. I knew by the look on his face that something horrible had happened. She had ended their relationship and he was devastated. However, somehow, through his sadness, he was able to use the loss as motivation to do really well in school. I was so proud of him.
Eventually, I was offered a promotion at another college. I tried calling him before I left the college, but to no avail. I was sitting in my new office at my new college and my cell phone rang. It was my former assistant telling me that he was looking for me and asked my permission to give him my personal cell number. I agreed, something I don’t normally do. He didn’t call.
Several weeks later, I was in my office and there was knock at the door. He drove to my new college to give me an update on his life. He came with a purpose that day. He wanted me to attend his graduation. I was so honored. I knew how limited those tickets were and he wanted me to see him walk across the stage.
To this day, we are still connected. We talk, not as much as before, but we share a commitment to our faiths. He calls/texts me for Christmas and I call/text him for Ramadan. We know how important our religious beliefs are to each other and strive to learn and honor them.
All those years ago, he helped me just as much as I helped him. He gave me the confidence to trust my instincts and reach out to students when I thought I needed to. I never doubted my intuition again. My commitment to students has never faltered. I am truly privileged to have him, and so many other students, in my life.
DrYesiAvalos 